Here is an example of what we we are looking for in our contest. You need to send pics, but it would increase your chances of winning if you gave us a written break down of the rooms that are most the most triflin', stories about how this room was made, and even kicking in some of that hella college sarcasm if you can. You'll want to sell the house you're describing as the most triflin' spot in all the land, but we want proof that this place you are describing IS REALLY YOURS AND NOT SOME PIC ON THE INTERNET OR SOME PIC PHOTOSHOPPED, and should you win the contest, we will take a tour of this place to verify it as hella college. Again, the writing is not mandatory, but it will help you persuade the judges. For information, look at the previous post below.
Oh, and this place I'm about to describe is real.
Concrete paths, dirt, and loose weeds tatter front yard--the land lord has promised to fix it up since September--and it is now March. While it more like a prison than a house on the outside, this is the chosen residence of 4 young scholars. If you follow the "grey" brick road to that window with a locked handle they call a door, you will witness one of the most hella college environments known to man.
THE DOORWAY/PLAYROOM:
As you take your first step inside, you look to your right and see a shrine of frisbees. about 8 or nine flying saucers that one dim-witted individual decided would be "cool" nailed to the wall side by side. as you walk around, don't trip over that soccer ball that everyone randomly juggles in between commercials, and feel free to take a shot on the basketball hoop...if you can find the ball. There's also there's a dartboard thats posted on the corner of a hall that leads to the kitchen. I've always laughed at the thought of someone coming out of the kitchen with a fresh bowl of top ramen, and losing an eye in the process of getting to the TV--but this risk doesn't matter because what What would a hella college household be without an inconvieniently placed dartboard?
well,above all, a hell of a lot safer.
THE LIVING ROOM:
Every man with a funtioning erection's dream. Two tv's, two xbox 360s, a couch, a recliner (that probably doesn't recline...), framed movie posters, leftovers from last week sitting on top of the tv (WTF are half eaten tortillas doing on top of what I'm watching?), a newly built computer that has hella games but no internet, an nintendo 64 (keep it classic),eternally empty beer cans, a stewy bobble head, the fireplace that will never be used, and even a universal control that looks like that brainwashing device off of Men In Black.
THE KITCHEN/MESS HALL:
...It's a mess. In the sink, there's an untraveled mountain of dishes left from that romantic mac N' cheese dinner a roommate and his girlfriend had last night. On the window seal, a graveyard of all the widmers that they've induldged (theres an empty spot where the lock on the window is). The fridge is a ravenous pile of frozen goods, junk food, and junk food.
THE BATHROOM/LIBRARY:
In the event that you have to ship the chocolate to the factory, take the kids to the pool, or take a shit, this house has a perfect little place to do so: the bathroom. but I assure you this isnt any bathroom. it's more like a shitter's convention library. they have a "bathroom trivia book" a "mad tv bothroom book" and many other fun and interesting novelties to keep you on the crapper long enough to make the next person in line piss themselves.
AND FINALLY...THE BEERPONG ROOM:
upstairs in the attic-like area leading to someone's room, the folks at this lovely palace decided to craft a state-of-the-art beerpong room. The room has speakers spread about to distract players from making it in that last cup, 3 black lights to show you which guys are chronic masterbaters, a checker design made with white printing paper on the wall that, when combined with the blackligts, make the walls look like chess on mushrooms. and Even the table itself is a marvel--white with green trim around the egdes, green equilateral triangles where they form the cups, and a nice big O in the middle of the half table line representing the university of Oregon. my only conern was how close it was to the stairs. I asked them "how do you guys prevent the ball from falling down them?" A guy then pointed to a line of red cups taped together that stopped balls from going downstairs.Hella Crafty.
so submit your pics and (optional) stories to our email @ hellacollege@gmail.com, or in person if you're unfortunate enough to know us.
-Hella College.
